'to break a kookee into pieces.
1. get a firm grip on her it.
2. break.
yes, it is second nature.


i never said i could give you the promise
that i would be a ball of smiles everytime you looked
or have the sun shine in my heart forever and a day.

i never said it was guareented
that aletheia would be aletheia
forever and a day.

but aletheia isnt all crazy hyperness
and laughter
and utter random-ness that you are
oh-so-farmiliar with.

forever and day.



together?

-
i am now currently in a state of
denial,
senile-ness
and utter senile-ness.
stuck.
spriting awayy like complete crap.
who cares. all i want to do is run far far far away. let the pounding of my head, my mind, soul and feet form this random rhythmn that only i can be part of.
utter senile-ness. utter utter.
i have known the meaning of
crying and laughing mixed together till you cant tell the difference,
crooning- half crying, into the phone,
gaging,
half awake and crying some more.
it doesnt do me any good. i am
stuck,
shadowed,
under the water,
sprinting awayy awayyy awayyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
and what hurts, is that i cannot deny why i want to cry


together nine hundred, forty-one.
no more no more no more no more
and while i get further away, and smaller
and eventually
dissappear from view.


i will sit on the bed of
sand.
and draw pictures in the wet
grains.
of footprints and rainbows
that ends in fluffs of clouds.
and the tide comes
in
-
washed away.
washed out.


i renamed this blog from insanity rules to crumbs of a kookee.
so much more fitting.
whats a cookie thats not broken?
not ale.
crumbs small enough to pass through the eye of a needle.
crumpled kookee.

to serve the Lord, you must first break down your soul.
your prideful, deaf, mute, stupid fool of fools soul.
right?





im hungry. xD